Healing the Broken Hearted: Understanding Your Family of Origin
The family unit that you grew up in is your family of origin. It often includes parents and siblings, but may encompass other relatives or individuals who lived with you during part of your childhood. We are strongly influenced in who we become by those who raised us and the significant others within that family group.
Identify some things that you learned from your family of origin:
HELPFUL UNHELPFUL
1. What communication styles were modeled? Open/Honest Guarded/Indirect
2. How was conflict handled in relationships? Healthy dialogue Avoided/held grudges
3. How were emotions expressed? Free/welcomed Suppressed/discouraged
4. How did family members respond to stress? Peaceably Anger/tension
5. How were you received as a person in your home? Seen and heard Unseen/silenced
6. Did you feel valued as a member of your family? Yes No
7. What did you learn about marriage or relationships? Love/respect/compassion Conflict/disrespect/hatred
8. Where you taught about God and how to relate to Him? Yes No
9. Was there work ethic and a healthy view of responsibility? Yes/balanced No/out of balance
10. What financial habits were evident? Positive/stewardship Negative/fear of lack
11. How was the home managed? Orderly/cleanliness Disorder/unkept
12. What were boundaries like in your home? Healthy/clear Too ridged/non-existent
13. What was affection like in your home? Love shown/modeled Withheld/minimized
14. How was discipline carried out in your home? Consistent/helpful Inconsistent/harmful
Write down any details regarding the points above or other things that you learned or experienced from family:
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Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you any normalized patterns that may actually be the result of wounds and needs healing.
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